meh.

i can act crazy a lot. don't worry, i'm aware of this and i'm seeking help. but when mornings like this one occur, i realize that my craziness is not unfounded. woke up early to do a set change, and yet was running late before the clock struck 6. filled my reservoir, had a heck of a time connecting it to the infusion set (e says that i am just getting frustrated; i think something might really be different with the 6mm infusion sets), and then got the new set in. primed, bolused for breakfast, etc. watched my shirt obsessively while bolusing to make sure there were no insulin leaks. i do this a lot. i check check check before i eat, go to bed, and randomly throughout the day, especially on my way to work. i am a checker. and one time, my infusion set actually was leaking insulin. so i feel like maybe this checking is worth it, even though the amount that i do is obsessive.
okay, so back to devil morning. while waiting for my insulin to kick in, i made the bed, did some ironing, and dried my hair. when i finished drying, i smelled that sickening medicinal smell. my stomach dropped. ##$%! something was wrong. i raised my gigantic hooded sweatshirt, and lo and behold, my tee was speckled with three dime-sized spots of pure insulin.
#$%^! #$%^! #$%^! #$%^!
i don't really use profanity all that much. "what the mullet?!" is about as far as i go. but not this morning. you would have thought i was raised by pirates. however, i was able to keep a clear head and thought back to the last time this happened. my first step was to detach the set and reconnect. i then felt around to see if the infusion site was still leaking. my shirt was still dotted with insulin, but i was not sure if this meant that the leak was still going, or because the area underneath the the injection site was still wet with insulin from before.
#$%^! #$%^! #$%^! #$%^! i was already late for work, leaking insulin, but of course needed to eat because i'd bolused for breakfast and wasn't sure how much had actually gone into my body. but i assumed that some had, since i had watched my pump pretty closely during the actual bolus delivery.
i finished styling my hair and poured some coffee. checked my shirt again. it was dry. it seemed like the pump had stopped leaking for the time being. maybe the site just wasn't connected all the way before? oh well, i was still late and needed to eat. so i gave myself an extra boost of insulin just in case my body hadn't gotten enough before and had my eggbeaters, apple, and english muffin, with a side of massive anxiety. i probably checked my shirt 14 more times while eating and on my way here to work. (where i arrived only 9 minutes late. a true achievement on my part, considering this AM's obstacle course. it was worse than double dare.)
and then, after all that, i get here and check my sugar: 79.
is 8:52 too early for a drink?